Destructoid’s games of the week for 03/25/07: Triumphant return edition?

For those keeping score at home, I kinda, sorta, somehow missed last week's session of "what have the editors been jamming into their consoles?", and for that I'm very, very sorry. I've been beating myself up about it all week, and at one point I took to downing handfuls of Percocet washed down with rum in a vain effort to end my bleak, meaningless existence. As it turns out, sadly, I'm an immortal. Did you ever see that movie The Highlander? Yeah, same idea, except I can only be killed by bees. So after I managed to stop vomitting up my organs and my non-necrotic bits started knitting themselves back together, I woke up and realized that I really ought to get to work on this week's edition.

In the end, there isn't a joke here. You were all hoping for something entertaining but the best I could come up with was a quip about suicide-by-overdose and a reference to a Christopher Lambert film that maybe a hundred people saw back in the late-80s and even fewer people remember. 

God, remember when I used to be good at this kind of thing? Wasn't that awesome? I'm washed up kids. I'm falling apart.

We're reaching the point where the inevitable is walking down a pier and falling into the ocean. You won't see it until it's too late and by then I'll be gone. Don't blame yourselves, you did everything you could. It's an innate destructiveness, and I'm tired of fighting. So very tired. 

Original post by mrdestructoid@gmail.com (Destructoid.com) and software by Elliott Back